Tiring Saturday

I think I was able to maximize my Saturday, being out almost thirteen hours. I guess my feeling-practical self emerged when I planned my events for that day. I knew I would be meeting former colleagues for dinner, so I organized my day based on that.

So around eleven in the morning -- after breakfast, my taebo workout and a bath -- I headed to Little India. It was my first time to go to that area. First, I was curious about the 24-hour mall Mustafa And second, my sister said bangles there are quite cheap. So I do go there and I was able to buy pretty cheap gold and silver bangles. I was able to find other good buys too, mostly stuff for the kitchen -- like a Thai Tamarind dressing which I should try soon.

Then I took the train to Chinatown. Which was funny. I went all the way there to buy from this dimsum stall. Ahh.... the glutton in me. That was my lunch. I then walked to a nearby Korean restaurant to check out some stuff for my sister, but I think the items there were quite expensive. I then walked to Funan the IT Mall to canvass for fax machines for my dad and to check out tripods for my camera. (Hopefulyl I'll be able to get one before my parents come over)

After that I went to the malls around the Suntec area -- Raffles, Suntec itself, Marina Square and Millenia Walk. Although they are pretty much in the same cluster they were quite a walk from each other. Good thing I was wearing my tsinelas. I checked out a new hypermart open at Marina Square then I checked a furniture store at Millenia Walk for bulbs for the Flos chandelier my cousin got in Manila. But wasn't successful there.

I planned to hear mass at six so with still an hour or so left I walked to Bugis Mall, just to go window-shopping, then I walked to the Bras Basah Complex to check some architectural books for a side-project I'm working on, had a drink in McDonalds, walked back to Bugis to change for my evening dinner, then went to mass.

But during mass I was texted that our dinner was offset for an hour and a half. So I decided to walk back to Raffles and grabbed a bite at Burger King (what a pig I am -- a meal of double Mushroom Swiss, fries, chicken nuggets and a drink -- it's a normal value meal here. ugh.) while reading the third book of the Shopaholics series. There at Burger King I met one of my former colleagues. Then we both walked to Chijmes to meet the rest.

It was an okay gig. I didn't like the drink I ordered. I think I've been having too much Malibu lately. I should have gone for the Lychee drink. But at least I know for next time.

We split up before twelve since the flight of my friend was the next day.

So that was my maximized day. In writing I just realized how much I walked and how much I ate. Hahahah.

this week's news

The politics of Singapore is quite hilarious. The other day the two headlines were about the new pope and Singapore Prime Minister's go signal to put up a casino (which they cover as an "integrated resort" which happens to have a casino). And it was such a big issue -- the government weighing the economic and social issues. With Singapore being a money-hungry nation, of course the economic issue prevailed -- to create jobs, higher revenue, blah blah.

But I don't mind. In fact, I'm excited for the casino! I've never been to one and it would be very interesting to try it out. It would be the closest thing I'll be able to experience to Vegas, with all the tourists here. And maybe my weekly poker practices in my laptop may be put to good use! Hahaha.

a bit of feng shui

With a few stuff that Haydee passed on to me (a shoe rack, a side table, etc) I was able to improve my room a bit in terms of storage and organization, And I couldn't resist. I set up a spot (strategically positioned, according to feng shui) for my pink stuff, fake flowers and a few romance novels. According to feng shui if I place that in a particular corner my love life will become successful. Hahaha. Well worth trying right?

saying goodbye

Today was supposed to be the last time I'll be seeing my "family" here in Singapore -- Haydee, Joel, and the two kids. (although Joel will still stay for years more). For the past months they've been my family, answering most of my questions about living here, beings ears for my problems and issues, providing me with a family, even if it's just a visit once a month.

It was really sad, a bit tearful. I don't have anyone else like them here. I still have Joel to contact if I have any problems though. But still not the same. But I guess it's time for me to move on, be a bit more independent.

Good thing there was something Haydee forgot to give me today. So I'll be seeing them this Tuesday. It's worth the trip after work.

And I promised them I'll be visiting them in their province this December.

I guess with my current lifestyle I have to get used to temporary goodbyes. Become a bit more numb. Get used to letting go.

my memory

Risha, you remembered 93% of the information in the Memory Test.

But research shows there's a lot you can do to improve your memory. And if you do, it can help you function in more ways than you'd think. There are 6 main types of memory, which help us interpret and store different types of information. You scored highest in numeric memory.

That kind of memory allows you to remember things like phone numbers, numerical addresses, and dollar amounts. You probably also have a knack for recalling people's birthdays, phone numbers and important dates in history, too.

... this is funny cuz I usually forget birthdays (except for the birthdays of people who really matter to me).

Darn, this test was tough. I was never a good "memorizer".

open letter

I've written about this guy months back in this journal. I haven't correspended with him since December. It's mostly my fault that happened but maybe it was for the best. But I couldn't help but feel guilty about it. Once in a while he creeps up into my thoughts -- sometimes wondering if he hates me now or what. Although I know he doesn't hate me. I've done this to him before and somehow we became friends again afterward.

Well anyways, this entry is triggered by me dreaming about it last night. I guess my conscience is calling out. I've considered emailing or texting him. But maybe that's a wrong move after four months of not hearing from me.

So just as a form of disclosure, this letter is for him.

* * *

I know I've done it again. Disappearing out of the blue. After the time we saw each other again after months and months (or even more than a year) of no communciation, I tried to make an effort to be honest with you. I even told you straight out you didn't have a chance. That maybe you would find someone who would deserve you more. That was cruel, but you deserved the truth.

But my Christmas vacation in Manila suddenly gave me reason (probably a weak one) to do my disappearing act again. You wanted to meet up, even asking our common friends to text me too. I didn't get myself to get pressured from that. My giving in would have given the wrong signals to both you and our friends.

And you didn't give much effort anyways. Texting me non-stop. You know my landline, man. Is it that hard to call me? (Okay, maybe I just mentioned this just to make me feel better.)

I know there is a big chance we'll cross paths again one day, with our small circle. Right now, I honestly don't know how I will handle it. I admit I didn't handle this situation in the most mature way.

I honestly don't know if I should ask for forgiveness. But nevertheless I hope you're doing okay.

sensitivity and technology issues

My sensitivity sometimes come out in the weirdest times and circumstances. My paranoia could be quite hilarious, even over text messages and yahoo messaging.

Absence of smiley faces in text messages make me sometimes think if the person is mad at me or feels pestered by me. Text messaging I swear is one of the top reasons for miscommunication. It isn't the lingo, but the limit of text you can place in a 150-character screen expandable to 450. There isn't voice intonation or body language to give you an idea of what the person is thinking or feeling. Not everyone is into smiley faces. Not everyone is into punctuation marks.

My latest paranoia is from yahoo messaging. I've caught a few high school friends of mine (read; close friends then, barkada) online. Usually I would be the one to message them. They would respond, then that would prompt me to go on. Then that's it. No more messages from them. Hello, you might as well become invisible to me. That's what stealth settings are for. Better I not know you're online than make me feel stupid.

As Ebenezer Scrroge may say over technology, "Bah humbug!"

all about a skirt

Our company had our annual dinner & dance last December 4. It was held in Malacca, Malaysia. We therefore had a Batik and Kebaya Night and to stick to the theme, I bought a batik skirt which I made sure I'd be able to wear again. It's a black wrap skirt with a floral print of pink, white, mustard yellow and green.

I was looking through my cabinet and drawers yesterday and I felt like wearing something different, tired of wearing the same old stuff. So today I wore it to work. And at least two people have noticed it and funny no one noticed it when I wore it to the dinner & dance. I guess since everyone else was wearing batik that evening. Or maybe they know my wardrobe too well that something different would be easily recognized.

Like yesterday, I wore a top for the first time to work -- a sequined top that my sister gave me for Christmas. I was talking to our technical girl -- the irritating b**** behind me, and while I was consulting with her she was just staring at my top. If she were a man I would have thought she was looking at my you-know-what. Hahahha.

I guess I've forgotten how fun it is to dress up or to wear new stuff. As a shopper, I've always stuck to the generic plain clothes that I would wear over and over again. Maybe my wardrobe needs some sprucing up, in a practical way.

And to emphasize my point here, results of a Tickle test agreed with me:

Risha, you're ready for a Fashion Makeover

It's not that you don't have a great wardrobe. But do you ever feel like your wardrobe hasn't changed in say, oh, a millennium? Sure you might be a master of ignoring the frayed edges, holes in hidden places, and elastic that barely holds anything in place. But isn't it time to get with the program?

You may call yourself quirky and frugal, but my friend, it's time to splurge a little on yourself. What have you got that you really can't live without? Even if those wide wale cords come back into fashion, do you really want them to? Take a deep breath, and let go of what you no longer need. Buy a couple of new fashion essentials that you've been eyeing. Then realize this: the body you wear is almost more important than the clothes that hang off of it.

Spend some time making a stronger fashion statement from the inside out. Sometimes the quickest way to look fresh and styled is to take better care of yourself.

The Man of My Dreams

Hold your horses. I haven't met him yet. I just took another of the Tickle tests and here's my result.

Risha, The Boy Next Door is the man of your dreams

The guy next door can be a lot more than the kid who played a great game of tag and buried you in snowballs. He can be the man of your dreams. A laidback and fun girl like you doesn't need a glass slipper or fancy jewels — you just want a guy who knows how to have a good time and has a handle on what's important.

You're the kind of girl who wants to marry her best friend, so you might not have to look far for the perfect guy for you. Whoever said you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince wasn't talking about you. Tag — you're it!


Hmmm....

Lonely Girls

[background music: Lonely Girls from the OST of Shallow Hal]

Yes, there are days that I do feel lonely. I guess it's just magnified with me in a different country, surrounded with people of different cultures. But if I compare my feeling-lonely days to my non-lonely days I think I could say that I am generally not lonely. It's because I'm used to doing things on my own. It doesn't take much to amuse me. I could easily amuse myself with activities that others may find boring but I'm happily content with.

I guess I've set myself up for this. I'm usually a loner in our apartment. I'm usually a loner during weekends. I'm a loner everyday during lunch. I've somehow alienated myself from everyone else -- my housemates, and my officemates. The usual small chit chat during lunch doesn't relax me, so I opt to just be on my own. Enjoy alone-time (as if I don't get enough of it! haha)

Oh well... cheers to myself!

pests

I am most irritated with people who pester me. I hate being nagged actually, and my mom could vouch for that. During my adolescence days I'm sure my mom knew I disliked it so much when she kept on reminding me to do my chores, etc. And believe me, I'm not a very obedient child. I hated chores. I did shortcuts for everything, to save time and effort.

I don't like people who don't know how to mind their own business, when their line of questioning is already imposing on you. Pakialameros, what you may call them. I guess my introvert side is crying out for it not to be bothered.

So please, just let me be.

calling all eligible male aquarians...

Risha, the best Zodiac Match for your personality is Aquarius

Aquarius, the Water Bearer (January 21 to February 19): This friendly and thoughtful partner is just your type. Initially, an Aquarius may catch your attention by showing you their intellectual side and optimistic outlook. But as you get to know them better, you're likely to be even more drawn to an Aquarian's idealistic resolve and focus on making positive change. People born under this sign are frequently capable of seeing both sides in any dispute. This can make them quite talented when it comes to finding creative solutions in your relationship. Your Aquarius may be a bit headstrong at moments, but they'll also tend to look for the bright side in times of trouble. In the bedroom, you'll likely find the Water Bearer both discrete and cautious. An Aquarian will ordinarily make sure that all areas of your relationship are strong before plunging into sex. Overall, Aquarians are solid, unwavering partners and complex people. So, it may take you a little extra time to get to know your Aquarian match, but it's apt to be well worth the wait.Although Aquarius is your strongest Zodiac Match, your responses indicate there are a number of other astrological signs that you're highly compatible with.

:P

hey, it's me

A few months back someone greeted me for a certain occasion -- I don't really remember; it could have been Valentines, Easter or something else -- and added a "don't ever change".

Sensitive as I am, I paused to think if I did change over the past months. I truly hope for the better if I did change. I know I've become more independent, more confident in some aspects, wilder in a sense (re: taking more risks), and hopefully more mature. I also wondered why that person mentioned it in the first place. Did he/she sense a start of a change? Should I be more aware of how I act?

I hope I won't change into someone I would hate. I am aware of my many weaknesses and negative characteristics. If I'm conscious about them, I try to change those. But sometimes by subconsciousness prevails.

But nevertheless I hope I'll remain real, true, and improve wherever I can.

tribute

As the Catholic world is mourning over the Pope's death, I find myself reflecting over how such a simple man touched so many lives. I found it is an opportunity to be thankful for all my blessings, realizing that anything more than simple is such extravagance. The Pope is an epitome of God touching each of our lives.

... I am thankful for I am blessed with a loving and supportive family.
... I am thankful for the countless blessings that I have received all throughout my schooling, and in my career
... I am thankful for all the opportunities that come my way; I am thankful that somehow my future is brighter than I ever thought it would be
... I am thankful for all the friends that come into my life, to guide me through my different experiences
... I am thankful for being alive, that I am here to write this, that I can feel, that I can see, that I can hear, and that I am healthy

... Thank You.

saturdays walks

I've somehow made a routine for my Saturdays (save for those that I have things that come uplike gimiks and such). After lunch (given I've eaten and done my taebo) I head to Orchard to do errands, namely to borrow or return books in the library at Takashimaya and if needed, to buy call cards at Lucky Plaza (given that the Filipino masses convene there, call cards are cheapest there due to the bulk consumption of the flips). I get there around two and around five I start heading to church, which is at the opposite end of the road. (Imagine walking the whole stretch of Katipunan Road, from UPIS to PSBA!) I really don't know why I do it. I guess since I want to check out what happens in the better malls along the stretch. I need the exercise too since I tend to eat more during the weekends. And let's just say that's my procession till the anticipated mass that I attend at six.

Today I ended up walking almost one and a half of that length. I was an hour too early for mass, so I ended up walking to this other mall. What made it more difficult was that I did my groceries, so I had two semi-heavy grocery bags. With the inspiration of my long walk I felt like buying healthy. Seriously! To dictate what I bought: quaker oats, vinaigrette dressing, yakult, and half a watermelon. (Imagine how heavy that was!) Come on, I should be more motivated now to eat healthy.

I also ended up buying this cute top at Far East Plaza (four or more floors of what you see in the tiangges in Manila). A bit expensive compared to my usually buys, but it was too darn cute. At least I'll look forward to wearing it and maybe look for an occasion to wear it, hehe.

I was quite amused this afternoon. In one of the malls one guy doing surveys asked me if I was Singaporean. Then while I was walking to church this Singaporean teenager asked me (me!) for directions. And I actually knew where it was! What does that say about me? Hahaha.

And then there was this lady who also stopped me for this survey about hair products. She asked me where I buy my hair products. I explained to her that I'm from Manila and I buy my toiletries there whenever I go home. So she asked me, "So you don't buy hair products here?" like it was so unbelievable. D-uh, wasn't that what I said?

real

Let me sing it while I'm still 23 for a few more weeks...


Look at me I'm twenty three
Beautiful a sight to see
Tonight

A little dress to draw the press
And I'll be leaving
All the rest behind

Well be pleased girl
If this is what you wanted
The whole world is watching you take the stage
What will you say

Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real

I close my eyes imagine time
Will not forget
My sacrifice

I numb the ache and decorate
My emptiness
Stand naked in the light

Well be pleased world
If this is what you wanted
This young girl is everything that you made
What will she say

Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real

The world goes home
The lights go down
My lipstick fades
Away

Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real

Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real

-- Real (Plumb)

aging too soon

I bet my housemates think I'm such a bore, spending most of my free time in my apartment, or rather my room. And I usually turn them down when they invite me to go out with them. (I don't want to make a career out of being a third wheel!) I usually prefer going straight back to the apartment after work, do my ritual workout and bath, then chill with a good TV show, a good book, a movie or playing poker in my laptop.

Weekends aren't different as I usually choose to just go out one day and stay back on the other to do my chores, cook, or do the same stuff I do weeknights. Somehow I feel the weekend is longer that way. No bus rides to speed up time. So the weekend won't be over too soon.

And going out too much is tiring, as I experienced it last week. And it just gave me a hangover during the rest of the week. So I do sometimes (or even frequently) filter the gimiks I go out to. So yes, hi, I may be the oldest twenty-three-year-old girl you may know.